Monty drug-tested at Bridgestone Invitational

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Written by Brandon Underwood Online Editor   

Colin Montgomerie doesn't look very happyRusty Miller of The Associated Press crafted a beautiful lead to this story, writing "After a long and difficult round, Colin Montgomerie was less than thrilled to have to deal with one more cup."

Monty had to provide a "pee sample" after shooting a 72 during the first round of the World Golf Championships - Bridgestone Invitational. Taking a shot in the dark here, but I'm guessing it comes back negative. 

Skepticism in sports is at an all-time high due to the Steroids Era in baseball and the recent betting scandal involving NBA referee Tim Donaghy so it’s perfectly reasonable of the PGA Tour to impose such a policy. After all, with so much money at stake, cheating makes sense.

But come on, Colin Montgomerie? It’s almost like you should have to meet certain criteria before incurring a test. Maybe the phrase, “Reasonable Doubt” should enter the equation somewhere.

Golfers have made great strides in terms of physical fitness during this decade but certain players have not.

While Phil Mickelson’s man boobs have faded like Phil Mickelson when paired with Tiger Woods in a Major Championship thanks to his new workout regimen and commitment to staying in shape, Monty’s are still quite pronounced.

If Monty is injecting anything maybe it’s butter or Maple syrup; even some miracle substance that allows him to maintain a constant scowl.

I think they should also drug test Craig Stadler and Laura Davies while they’re at it.

Surely, Monty won’t want to, as noted cheater Mark McGwire famously stated “talk about the past”, as in all of his Major Championship failures, but he is looking forward to this year’s Ryder Cup in Kentucky if he makes the team.

Let’s hope that the only talk surrounding Monty over the next few months will concentrate on his ability to put it into the cup with his putter instead of his, well you know. 

 

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