Some things to ponder

--- Never wash your ball on the tee of a water hole.
--- The six stages of golf are Sudden Collapse, Radical Change, Complete Frustration, Slow Improvement, Brief Mastery, and Sudden Collapse.

--- Don't play with anyone who would question a 7.


--- If your driver is hot, your putter will be ice cold; if you can hit your irons, you will top your woods; if you are keeping your right elbow tucked in, your head will come up.


--- It takes 17 holes to really get warmed up.


--- One birdie is a hot streak for senior golfers.


--- Whatever you think you're doing wrong is the one thing you're doing right.


--- Any change works for three holes.


--- Never try to keep more than 300 separate thoughts in your mind during your swing.


--- It's surprisingly easy to hole a 50-foot putt when you lay 8.


--- Confidence evaporates in the presence of a fairway pond.


--- It's not a gimme if you're still away.


--- The more your opponent quotes the rules, the greater the certainty that he cheats.


--- Always limp with the same leg for the whole round.


--- The rake is always in the other trap.


--- The wind is in your face on 16 of the 18 holes.


--- The rough will be mowed tomorrow.


--- The ball always lands where the pin was yesterday.


--- You can hit a 2-acre fairway 10% of the time and a two-inch branch 90% of the time.


--- The practice green is either half as fast or twice as fast as all the other greens.


--- Your straightest iron shot of the day will be exactly one club short.


--- No matter how far its shaft extends, a ball retriever is always a foot too short to reach the ball.


--- A ball you can see in the rough from 50 yards away is not yours.

 

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